Practicing Forbearance

It was too hot today to accomplish very much, including exercise or stretching. Since I’ve been having back trouble, I find that starting the day with a good dose of yoga, stretching and special exercises makes the likelihood of a relatively pain free and mobile day much more likely, although no guarantee. Consequently, today I didn’t do so well. I shuffled around, dragging one leg and did a few things, mostly trying to find a comfortable position to stand or sit in and spending the day talking about the projects we will do–someday, like pave a new terrace by the house, mulch the flowerbeds, build a deck by the pond, clean and organize the workshop, replace or beautify the shed. At one point I even dragged a measuring tape around and took down a few numbers on a very bad sketch. As a person who has always been full of ambition and energy, I’d much rather just DO the jobs than spend countless hours talking and planning. Some planning is always necessary, of course, but I’m much more inclined to jump in. I love the feeling of accomplishment.

I also wasn’t feeling inspired to blog. There just wasn’t very much in my head, beyond the heat and the jab of sharp pain in my spine.

So I thought this was a good time to talk about the NAME of my blog, i.e. Paramita. I can’t remember what I was researching a while back, something about Buddhism, and I found this definition on Wikipedia:

Paramita

Pāramitā (Pāli; Sanskrit; Devanagari: पारमिता) or pāramī (Pāli) is “perfection” or “completeness.”[1] In Buddhism, the pāramitās refer to the perfection or culmination of certain virtues. In Buddhism, these virtues are cultivated as a way of purification, purifying karma and helping the aspirant to live an unobstructed life, while reaching the goal of enlightenment.

In the Pāli canon’s Buddhavaṃsa[3] the Ten Perfections (dasa pāramiyo) are (original terms in Pāli):

1. Dāna pāramī : generosity, giving of oneself

2. Sīla pāramī : virtue, morality, proper conduct

3. Nekkhamma pāramī : renunciation

4. Paññā pāramī : transcendental wisdom, insight

5. Viriya (also spelled vīriya) pāramī : energy, diligence, vigour, effort

6. Khanti pāramī : patience, tolerance, forbearance, acceptance, endurance

7. Sacca pāramī : truthfulness, honesty

8. Adhiṭṭhāna (adhitthana) pāramī : determination, resolution

9. Mettā pāramī : loving-kindness

10. Upekkhā (also spelled upekhā) pāramī : equanimity, serenity

These seem to me to be pretty admirable goals to live by and ones that suit my current world view as I grow older. Clearly Number 5, energy and effort was not on the books. You’ll see that Number 6 is “Patience, Tolerance, Forbearance, Acceptance, Endurance.” So today I gave myself permission to work on this virtue.  It meant getting through the day without letting the frustration or anger surface. Just accepting that this was the kind of day I was going to have, and letting it be. Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully a more productive one.

Do you live with chronic pain, or some other situation that requires the cultivation of forbearance? Pull up a chair and share.